About Kumari

(here's the outline of Kumari's biography, her particular BPD symptoms, and the plan for recovery.) (I'm still working on this, but having it public for now is probably helpful.) 

Kumari's History

Biography

Kumari was born in August of 1991 (somewhere in Nepal). She has two older biological brothers, and lived with her parents and brothers until her mother died of an illness when she was a little over a year old. Her grandmother and brothers took care of her for a while, but the family thought she would have a better chance at life if she was put up for adoption. (Her biological father died a few years later when she was about 6 in an accident)

She was adopted in (1993?) by Jill and David and moved to Oklahoma. (...?)

Growing up- doesn't remember much? School with friends, family, other issues....?

Family

Dad's deployment- Some of the abandonment issues surfaced much more strongly after his (2 year?) deployment after 9/11, this was also a very difficult time on Jill which meant tensions were high 

Grade School- (any particular issues here?)

Middle School- (or here?)

High School- (and here?)

Colorado- Moved to Colorado in 2009? Right before finishing high school. 

Dad's Accident

Romantic life and coming out

Mental Health Struggles

Last 4 years-

Depression, cutting, suicidal, grief, self-hatred

Recently- alcohol abuse, some drug use, sexuality as a defense mechanism, excessive religious fervor as a defense mechanism, anorexia, long-term memory loss, wild mood swings, insomnia, constant exhaustion, volatile relationships, constant feelings of emotional pain, excessive spending, and of course cutting and suicide attempts

A lot of the symptoms of BPD (volatility, sensitivity) can be present in non-BPD people, but much like OCD or ADD you can have some of the symptoms and not cross over into disorder territory. BPD is a clearly-defined medical disorder, where the symptoms are near-constant and uncontrollable.

Some common BPD symptoms she doesn't have as strongly, like the splitting defense mechanism where someone else is all good or all bad. Possibly because of her more others-oriented mindset? And is fairly analytically-minded anyways? "I love them, I know they love me, but I have feelings of anger, blame, that I'm causing them pain..." rather than "they're evil and out to get me". Actually will probably make treatment easier, and makes relationships easier. Most types of BPD tend to use destructive behavior to
Kumari seems to get the mindset of "I need to fix everything myself but I don't know how. Everything is my fault but I can't fix anything."

Recovery Plan

For most BPD patients, they have to hit their version of rock-bottom before they really start reaching for treatment. Kumari's rock-bottom moment where she knew she could no longer maintain the status quo and had to either get treatment or die was her stay in the mental health hospital after her second major suicide attempt.
Cedar Springs- rock-bottom

Oklahoma

Dr. R and DBT therapy
Psychiatrist for comorbid disorders- Divalproex, Citalopram, Zolpidem
Doctor visits for insomnia, pain management, queasiness & headaches

Diet, exercise, sleep schedule, activities, work
Coping mechanisms- ice, rubber bands, writing, music, other distractions

Healthy support group

Avoiding alcohol, drugs, extra-relationship sexual encounters, cutting, spending

Working on finding regular work, writing, art, reading, social, D&D, crafts, wedding, music

Stability- avoiding known triggers